As a long-time educator and new mom of color, the subject of race in early childhood education is one that I’ve wrestled with for years. I’ve been asked by many students in my (predominantly white) preschool about my skin color, my dreadlocked hair, or the shape of my lips. These questions used to make me incredibly uncomfortable. 

It’s time for me — and for all of us — to move past the discomfort. Why? We need to talk about race with our children. 

Racial disparities are baked into all aspects of our society and our children’s amazing little brains are hardwired to look for — and make sense of — patterns in the world around them. Even if parents don’t consciously or unconsciously express race-based bias, children are like little computers, collecting data, adding it up, and drawing their own conclusions about what they see. 

Our Kids Are Spotting Patterns, Crunching Data, and Drawing Conclusions

Children are noticing, for the first time, trends that their grown-ups often take for granted, like the fact that people of color tend to work in certain jobs and live in certain areas. Children notice that the main characters in the books available to them are more likely to be animals (27% of books published in 2018) or white humans (50%) than people of color (source). They also notice the language we commonly use that tends to associate positive things with whiteness and negative things with blackness. Research tells us that children do make the connection between these ideas and the people around them (Katz, 2003; Tatum,1997).

We know that children are busy gathering this data and using it to help them understand the world. So, it is not surprising that children as young as 3 years old can express race-based bias. 

A recent study that aimed to revisit the historic Doll Test from the 1940s found that preschool children, regardless of race, still exhibit “a great deal of bias” in how they play with racially diverse dolls. 

“Numerous studies show that three- to five-year-olds not only categorize people by race, but express bias based on race (Aboud, 2008; Hirschfeld, 2008; Katz, 2003; Patterson & Bigler, 2006). In a yearlong study, Van Ausdale & Feagin (2001) found that three- to five-year-olds in a racially and ethnically diverse day care center used racial categories to identify themselves and others, to include or exclude children from activities, and to negotiate power in their own social/play networks,” Dr. Erin Winkler, an Associate Professor of African and African Diaspora Studies at the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee, wrote.

In other words, children can develop race-based bias by living in a racially biased society. 

So yes, we have to talk about race. If we don’t, we allow assumptions and biases to persist.

When we assume that young children are “colorblind” or that they are too young to talk about such an important topic, we leave children to draw their own conclusions to explain the patterns that they see in the world. Silencing the conversation doesn’t make the questions go away. 

By talking openly about race, you will let your child know that they can come to YOU with questions, and then you have an opportunity to change the narrative. 

Where to Begin?

We all know it might not be easy to begin this conversation with the kids in your life, no matter your race and regardless of whether you’re a parent or an educator. So where can you start? Here are four ideas:

1. Prepare yourself. When you talk about skin with your child, use simple language. Think ahead about words you could use to describe skin tone: dark brown, medium brown, sandy brown, tan, peach, peachy pink are all good descriptors of skin color. 
2. Books are a great way to start the conversation. Select books that your child will enjoy that also feature diverse characters. As you’re reading, comment on how your child is the same as and different from the characters in the book. Bonus points if you select a book that features a main character of color who overcomes adversity!
3. Create opportunities for your child to interact with children of different races and ethnicities. Try to visit playgrounds in new neighborhoods or visit restaurants to taste new foods. Interactions with people who are different from him or her will help them learn to see the humanity in everyone. We all are different AND the same.
4. If your child asks you why a person’s skin is a particular shade, you can take the opportunity to talk about melanin — everyone has it and the more you have, the darker your skin is. Melanin helps to protect skin from the sun.

Talking About Race Can Become as Easy as Talking About Other Differences that Make People Unique

As an educator, implementing these strategies helped me feel more confident in addressing children’s questions in an age-appropriate way and enabled me to respond to their inquiries with questions of my own that pushed their thinking and understanding. In fact, their curiosity often led to an emergent curriculum on the subject. I found that the more we talked about race, the easier it became. 

Talking about the hair texture, skin tone, and facial features of different people can be as normal and as easy as talking about differences in gender, height, occupation, skills, and anything else that makes people unique. 

Tackling this tricky conversation is one way to help move society in a new direction. 

If you’re still nervous, don’t worry! Your child will not mind if you fumble a bit with your words. The important thing is to open the door to conversation. You might even learn some new things, together.

It’s the Year of the Tiger!

More than 1 billion people across the world are saying “bye bye” to the Ox and “welcome!” to the Tiger this Lunar New Year, which begins on Feb. 1, 2022.

It’s a time of celebration in parts of Asia and around the world as families gather, eat, and celebrate the new year.

Even if YOUR family doesn’t celebrate Lunar New Year, this is a wonderful time for all families to learn about their own identities and explore the other people and cultures, similarities and differences that surround us.

Teachers and parents can help by: 

1. Reading stories about the holiday
2. Being inspired by art & food
3. Noticing similarities and differences

What is Lunar New Year?

“Lunar” means “moon” and the “Lunar New Year” celebrates the beginning of the lunar calendar, which is based on the 12 phases of the moon. 

In the same way that many families celebrate the New Year on January 1, the Lunar New Year is an opportunity to look forward and create goals for the coming year.

Each lunar year is represented by one of 12 zodiac animals. Each animal is associated with different traits. For example, this year is “Tiger,” which is known for its bravery and strength. Children born this year are thought to have some of the tiger’s traits! 

Families and communities have different ways of celebrating the holiday, including: 

• Festivals and parades
• Wearing red, which is considered a good luck color
• Lights and fireworks
• Family gatherings and special meals

Lunar New Year Stories

There are lots of wonderful picture books that you and your child can read to learn about the Lunar New Year. Here are a few great options to get you started: 

The Great Race: The Story of the Chinese Zodiac 

By Christopher Corr

The Runaway Wok: A Chinese New Year Tale 

by Ying Chang Compestine and Illustrated by Sebasita Serra

How to Catch a Dragon 

By Adam Wallace and Andy Elkerton

Goldy Luck and the Three Pandas 

By Natasha Yim and Illustrated by Grace Zong

Art and Food

The foods that families eat on the Lunar New Year aren’t just food! They represent good luck, prosperity, and togetherness. Here are some examples: Long noodles represent long lives; dumplings and steamed fish stand for wealth and abundance; sticky rice balls stand for togetherness. 

The art and decorations of the holiday also hold meaning. For example, many families decorate with lucky colors red and gold. 

You can learn more about Lunar New Year by exploring the tastes and colors of the holiday. Be sure to talk to friends and neighbors who celebrate to learn more! Here are some ideas for kid-friendly projects you can try to explore the art and food of the holiday: 

• Create a paper lantern with a printable template from our friends at Noggin.
• Create a paper fortune cookie!
• Create (and play) a new year drum.
• Read up on new year food in Bon Appetit Magazine, Food Network, The New York Times, The Woks of Life, or wherever you look for food and cooking inspiration!

Noticing Similarities and Differences

Each of us has an identity — it’s related to who WE are, which is related to our thoughts and beliefs and the traditions of our families and communities. Each of us is different, but we also have a lot in common with other people around the world. 

Parents and educators can help prepare children to thrive in our diverse world by helping them learn about their own identities AND by helping them to observe other people and notice the many similarities and differences that surround us. 

When various holidays are celebrated around the world, we have an opportunity to think about and explore identity, similarities, and differences with the children in our lives. For the Lunar New Year, try asking:

• How do we celebrate the new year? 
• Why do we celebrate the new year? 
• What are our wishes for the year ahead? 
• What was the animal in the lunar calendar the year YOU were born? (Here’s a page on National Geographic Kids where you can look up your animal.)
• What are some things that are similar and different between the new year’s celebration on January 1 and the Lunar New Year? 

As an early childhood educator and mother of a young child, I am acutely aware of the challenges educators and families have faced over the last 22 months. 

My daughter was born about a month before we all went into lockdown in March 2020. As we near her second birthday, it’s hard to believe distancing, face masks, separation from friends and family, and uncertainty have been the norm for her entire life. 

It’s unfathomable to think that more than more than 167,000 (roughly 1 in 450) U.S. children have lost a parent or grandparent caregiver to the virus (source). 

As parents and educators, we need to consider the impact this “new normal” is having on our individual children and on society as a whole, especially since we know how important the first three years of life are in children’s development (source). And we need to think about what we can do to support young children, even as they face today’s challenges. 

COVID’s Impact on Children’s Social and Emotional Learning

There’s been a lot written about “learning loss” in the older grades (source) (source), but there’s also a growing body of reports and research assessing the impact of the pandemic on children’s mental wellness and social-emotional learning. 

Last month, U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek H. Murthy released a youth mental health advisory. He wrote: “Supporting the mental health of children and youth will require a whole-of-society effort to address longstanding challenges, strengthen the resilience of young people, support their families and communities, and mitigate the pandemic’s mental health impacts.” 

A recent study from Columbia University and published in the journal JAMA Pediatrics found that that babies born in the first year of the pandemic, between March and December 2020 scored slightly lower on the Ages & Stages Questionnaire (ASQ) at 6 months of age than children born before the pandemic began. 

“We were surprised to find absolutely no signal suggesting that exposure to COVID while in utero was linked to neurodevelopmental deficits. Rather, being in the womb of a mother experiencing the pandemic was associated with slightly lower scores in areas such as motor and social skills, though not in others, such as communication or problem-solving skills. The results suggest that the huge amount of stress felt by pregnant mothers during these unprecedented times may have played a role,” said Dani Dumitriu, MD, PhD, assistant professor of pediatrics and psychiatry at Columbia University Vagelos College of Physicians and Surgeons and lead investigator of the study.

Dr. Dumitriu said these small shifts — at a population level — could have a “significant public health impact.” 

Another recent article indicates that mask wearing by adults and children may impact children’s social and emotional development as masks can impair our ability to recognize others’ emotions. This is particularly difficult for preschoolers who are just learning this complex skill. 

Despite our best efforts at transitioning our rich classrooms to “virtual learning environments,” enrollment is down across the country (source). 

Some families chose to delay their children’s first school experience while others pulled their children out of programs when distance learning options weren’t working well for them. Those who are currently enrolled certainly missed a good part of the school experience through the height of the pandemic. 

All of this missed schooling is reflected in increased behavioral challenges reported by parents and parents’ increased worries about their children’s social and emotional development and well-being (source). 

“The year that they were out of school was a year that they didn’t have the opportunities for developing the social skills that normally happen during their period of development,” Dr. Tami Benton told NPR recently. “And you’re sort of catching up on all of that under extraordinary circumstances.” (source). 

This is as true for preschool children as it is for those in K-12 schools.

How Can We Support Social and Emotional Learning for the Children of COVID?

There is still much to learn about the short- and long-term effects of the pandemic on early social and emotional learning (source). The question is: What can we do to help support our children, especially our youngest children who have lived most (or all) of their lives during this disrupted time? 

Here are 5 suggestions from a long-time educator and mom of a toddler: 

• Focus on Feelings: Help children clearly express their feelings by using specific language when supporting child-to-child interactions. Exaggerate your facial expressions if you are wearing a mask.
• Acknowledge ALL the Stress: We all feel stress, whether we’re preschoolers, parents, teachers, or administrators. It’s fine to explain in age-appropriate language to your child that grown-ups get stressed out, too. And a little grace goes a long way! 
• Calm Down: Practice and model strategies like deep breathing. Create a cozy space in your classroom or home that a child can choose to visit if they need a break.
• Adjust Expectations: Assume that each child is doing his or her best at any given moment. If a system isn’t working for a student, adjust the system rather than expecting the child to conform.
• Practice Peer Interactions: Learning to make friends, share, and solve problems with friends is important, but what feels “safe” is different for all families and keeps changing as the pandemic evolves. Find what works best for your child. As Dr. Kavita Tahilani explained, parents can find smaller, less intense ways for children to practice peer interactions. This may mean one-on-one playdates outside or virtual playdates using a common material like playdough.

With our focused, thoughtful attention to social emotional learning and the mental health of children and parents, the children in our care will be able to move past this time with resilience and strength.

For young children, the classroom is a community: a small version of the world.

As such, it is too often a place in which there is inequity, unkindness, and bullying among peers — and it’s also a place where children can practice being upstanders who stand up for friends.

Bullying remains pervasive in school settings. Some recent facts:

• 20.4% of children ages 2-5 had experienced physical bullying in their lifetime and 14.6% had been teased (verbally bullied) (source)
• About 1 in 5 U.S. students aged 12-18 say they have experienced bullying (source) 
• Children say they’re being bullied in school hallways or stairwells; classrooms; cafeterias; bathrooms; and playgrounds  (source)

As the director of a progressive preschool program and as the parent of a kindergartener, I deeply feel the need to help my child — and the children in my school — grow into empathetic friends who can stand up for what they believe is right and be “upstanders.” 

The idea that everyone deserves to be treated fairly and kindly is the heart of social justice, and preschools often work to put these values at the heart of their curriculum. These are skills that must be learned early, to help children grow into empathetic and kind adults, who will stand up for those not being treated kindly or fairly. 

We All Have a Role to Play in Creating a Culture of Upstanding

Teachers have an active responsibility of ensuring safety, kindness, and equity in classrooms, and parents also cultivate these skills at home. 

Learning to be an upstander ties together a lot of social and emotional skill “basics” like feelings, empathy, friendship. It’s something that we can start teaching when children are as young as two — and it is something we can practice throughout our lives. 

While learning to be an upstander can take work — it makes a difference: Research shows that when children stand up for each other, and are active when they witness bullying, this involvement is hugely effective in curbing the behavior. When upstanders intervene (child to child), bullying behavior stops within 10 seconds 57% of the time (source).

Start with Feelings and Empathy

How do we encourage young children to grow into upstanders — people who will stand up for what is right and help peers feel safe and welcome? 

For the very young, it begins with digging deeply into first noticing the feelings of others, and growing empathy.

For very young children (ages 2-4), the idea of standing up for other people will, at first, be beyond their grasp. Children at this age — by nature — have a very ego-centric view of the world. As they move through the preschool years, they develop the neural connections to be able to see the world from another’s perspective, and understand that others have feelings that may be similar or different from their own. 

Raising upstanders begins with growing empathy and cultivating the urge to help when someone else is feeling sad or having other uncomfortable feelings. 

At our preschool, social-emotional learning is an integral part of the curriculum. For two year olds, it begins very simply — when navigating conflict, teachers offer simple language, and encourage children to notice how their actions affect their peers. 

For example: “Look at Sarah’s face. She looks so sad. She didn’t like it when you pushed. Let’s go get her an ice pack to help her feel better.” 

Soon, teachers notice children responding to others in need, offering a friend a tissue, their lovey, or patting their back gently when they notice someone having a hard moment. Even two year olds are familiar with the warm feeling that comes with helping someone else.

The three- and four-year-old students at our preschool spend time actively learning about feelings as a curriculum theme. Group discussions are a way for children to build their own understanding on a theme by using each other as resources. 

During a recent feelings study in a 4s classroom, a teacher asked the group at morning meeting: “When someone is feeling sad, how can we help them feel better?” 

Children had many ideas: 

• Child: “They might need a tissue!”
• Child: “A hug.”
• Teacher: “Mmm. Who else has an idea? How can we help a friend who is sad?”
• Child: “Go find a teacher?”
• Teacher: “A teacher can always help children when they’re feeling sad.”
• Child: “Maybe they miss their mom.”
• Teacher: “Do you think that’s why they’re sad? What do you think would help?”
• Child: “Maybe to see their mom. Or hold their family collage?”
• Teacher: “Ah, yes! Those usually have pictures of grownups from your family.” 
• Child: “Sometimes I miss my mama.”
• Child: “Sometimes I miss my grandpa”
• Teacher: “It sounds like a lot of children feel sad when they’re missing their families.”

In this conversation, children were ready with ideas about how to comfort or care for someone. When they found common ground (many children thought about missing their family), the teacher noticed and reinforced the idea that many children can have that same strong feeling. 

The teacher recorded children’s ideas with an idea map, including  illustrations of different strategies to comfort or help a friend.

This image will stay on their classroom wall throughout the year, an easy reference when children were engaged with each other in the classroom.

Learn From Examples Through Upstander Stories

As children develop the ability to empathize and think outside themselves in the 4s and 5s, they also often become interested in the world around them, and the non-fiction section of the bookshelf becomes enticing. 

This age is perfect to introduce simply books and biographies about people in history who are “upstanders,” those who noticed unfairness and inequity, and who stood up for those who weren’t treated with kindness and fairness.

There is a growing set of wonderful picture books that help children think about inclusion, friendship, and how to support their peers. Some great ones to start with include: 

• Martin’s Big Words: The Life of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. by Doreen Rappaport
• We are the Water Protectors by Carole Lindstrom and Michaela Goade
• Little People, Big Dreams: Nelson Mandela by Maria Isabel Sanchez Vegara
• Malala’s Magic Pencil by Malala Yousafzai and Illustrated by Kerascoët
• The Big Umbrella by Amy June Bates and Illustrated by Juniper Bates
• Mushroom in the Rain by Mirra Ginsburg and Illustrated by Jose Aruego
• Strictly No Elephants by Lisa Mantchev and Illustrated by Taeeun Yoo
• All Are Welcome by Alexandra Penfold and Illustrated by Suzanne Kaufman

These stories serve as a jumping off point for rich conversations about justice, fairness, and how we can help make the world a safer, more equitable place. 

After my own little boy read Martin’s Big Words with his 4s class, they discussed the story as a class. Their teacher talked in simple terms about the civil rights movement. The teacher helped tell the story with the aid of a toy bus and some figures with light and dark skin. 

My child brought up the book and class discussion often at home, at first talking about “back when things weren’t fair.” We talked about how things were still not fair, referencing our family’s recent participation in a Black Lives Matter protest. He continued thinking through it in the coming weeks, asking questions like, “What other things are unfair for people with brown skin?” and “Why?” Parents and teachers might not have the answers to these big questions, and that’s OK! Sometimes the question “What do you think?” is enough to continue a dialogue that will grow and change as the child does. 

Making a Plan and Providing Language

As adults talk through big ideas with children and allow them lots of space for their own ideas, they’re helping them to learn the language they’ll need to address bullying and become upstanders. 

As children enter the 4-6 range, they are more and more capable to become upstanders among their peers. Sometimes that means simply modeling kindness and inclusivity themselves — inviting someone into a game, or sitting with them at lunch. 

It can help to create a simple script with your child, so they are ready and know what to say when a situation pops up when they see someone being bullied. This conversation may happen out of the moment, or in response to a situation that a child is processing. 

My child reported one day, “W. bumped C.’s ear, and it was not an accident, and the teacher didn’t know!” 

I started by acknowledging how it must be feeling for everyone involved. “It sounds like it made you so mad to see your friend get hurt. Was C. sad? Is he OK now?” 

I asked, “What do you think you could do next time to help your friend?” He suggested finding a teacher. Especially at this age, it’s wise to reinforce that this is ALWAYS a smart option when someone is hurt. We also practiced what my child could say, words such as:

• “Don’t Do That!”
• “That’s too rough!”
• “Stop!” 

Having a script in mind helps children feel like they are ready to help, with a toolbox of effective words. 

Sometimes adults shy away from talking about conflict with young children — as parents and educators, we wish that the world were always fair. It can be hard and sad for us to have those conversations with kids. But we can empower our children by making them part of the conversation, giving them the language to talk about feelings, and sharing tools with them that they can use to stand up for thief friends and be confident in caring for those around them. 

By now, you’ve almost certainly seen Fred Rogers’ advice for comforting kids: “When I was a boy,” he said, “and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’”

The quote can help us feel hopeful in trying times. But as Fred showed us in Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, it doesn’t take a tragedy to bring out the helpers. People also help in small moments and in all-but-invisible ways: A well-timed embrace. A kind word. Even just being there for someone who needs us. (“It’s really tough some days, isn’t it?” we might say to a friend.) 

Fred knew that small moments like these often make the biggest difference. Parents know it, too: Surveys suggest that for most of us, our highest hope for our kids is that they’ll grow up to be caring, generous people who help their families and neighbors.

According to a report released a few years ago by the Harvard Graduate School of Education, kids hear something else altogether: nearly 80 percent of young people say their parents are more concerned with achievement than they are about character. When asked what would make their parents prouder — getting good grades or being a helper — kids were three times more likely to pick the former. 

Be a Helper to Raise a Helper

As we write in our book, When You Wonder, You’re Learning: Mister Rogers’ Enduring Lessons for Raising Creative, Curious, Caring Kids, we can look to Fred to find out why.

One of the most important things Fred learned from his mentor, Margaret McFarland, was the Quaker philosophy that attitudes are caught, not taught. We can extol the virtues of helping all day long, but without action to back up our words, our words aren’t likely to stick. The best way to raise helpers, it turns out, is to strive to be helpers ourselves.

That might be easier said than done, especially amid the pressures and stress of modern family life. Even Fred liked to have a reminder: Once, while strolling his college campus, he discovered a plaque that said, LIFE IS FOR SERVICE. The inscription struck him as so simple, yet so profound, that it shaped the rest of his years. He wrote it on a slip of paper, which he put in his wallet and carried for decades. He even hung a photo of the plaque on his office wall. 

Though he’s best known for his make-believe Neighborhood, stories about Fred’s real-world service could fill a book. There’s the little girl whom he helped through a coma. There’s the journalist whose relationship with Fred changed the course of his life. The list goes on and on.

We’ve heard countless similar stories while sharing When You Wonder, You’re Learning with parents and teachers around the world. And we’ve heard them in our hometown of Pittsburgh, where Fred was our real-life neighbor. (There’s even a holiday here that celebrates Fred’s kindness — a holiday that ought to be national!)

Fred was the real deal, as kind in real life as he was on television. The Fred we saw on screen was not an act, but a practice. He led by example, helping his neighbors do the same. He showed the world that “each and every one of us can be as caring, kind, and influential in children’s lives as he was,” wrote his equally kind wife, Joanne, in the foreword to our book. Every last one of us can be a helper.

How to Help in YOUR Neighborhood

What might it look like to follow in Fred’s footsteps in our own lives and our own homes? And how might we raise kind children, remembering — as Fred did — that attitudes are caught, not taught?

With the holidays fast approaching, it’s a great time to wonder how we might serve others. Maybe there’s a food pantry where you and your family might help. Maybe an elderly neighbor needs help clearing some leaves. Or maybe, in this season of giving, you decide to give gifts a bit differently. Each year on their birthdays, for example, Gregg’s daughters get lots of presents, from which they choose just a small number to keep. They take the rest to Beverly’s Birthdays, a nonprofit organization that arranges birthday parties for kids experiencing homelessness. 

Whatever you do, it doesn’t have to be big. In fact, it’s better if it’s not big — if your helping, like Fred’s, happens in small moments and in all-but-invisible ways. 

“It’s tempting to think ‘a little’ isn’t significant and that only ‘a lot’ matters,” he once said. “But most things that are important in life start very small and change very slowly, and they don’t come with fanfare and bright lights.”

In a time when the brightest lights seem to shine on what matters least, it’s hard to imagine a more important lesson for young helpers. (And for us grown ones, too.)

Orion Jean’s fifth grade teacher mentioned the National Kindness Speech Contest to him — with just 24 hours to prepare. 

The Texas child, just nine years old at the time, won with his speech on making change with kindness — and put his $500 award toward a campaign he called the Race to 500 Toys, donating hundreds of toys to a local children’s hospital. He went on to launch the Race to 100,000 Meals around Thanksgiving 2020, followed by the Race to 500,000 Books, through which he rallied supporters to donate half a million books to kids in need. 

“If you just believe and if you continue to try your best — even if you’re only able to help one person, it’s definitely all worth it at the end because that’s what it’s about,” Orion said on the How to Help, an episode of the Little Kids, Big Hearts podcast focused on little kids who are big helpers. 

How to Help

All people — kids and grown-ups alike — have opportunities to be helpers every day, and research shows that humans are hardwired to help. Even babies make efforts to help other people, starting as young as 12 months old. 

Many people help others in small ways, but a select few people take on big challenges and find big solutions. 

On the new episode of the Little Kids, Big Hearts podcast, How to Help, host Todd Loyd talks with three little kids who are helping in big ways — making enormous impacts in their local communities and starting domino effects of giving. The episode’s goal? Helping to inspire kids and families listening to become helpers in their own schools and communities! 

Zohaib Begg, 9, Ashburn, VA

At the start of the COVID-19 pandemic in March 2020, Zohaib’s aunt, an emergency room doctor, told him about the shortage of personal protective equipment and asked his mom if she had extra swim caps she could use for protection.  

Zohaib had an idea: He set off to local hotels in Northern Virginia seeking shower caps and other unused items for frontline workers. He ultimately collected more than 6,000 items, including shower caps, gloves, and face masks, to help healthcare workers at the Inova Fairfax Hospital, where he’d received treatment for a serious health condition when he was just three years old. 

Last spring, he launched a new campaign to help the homeless community in Washington, D.C.. He gathered donations from friends and businesses that he engaged to work together to create kits that he handed out to homeless people. 

Working together with Sharon Wise, who once experienced homelessness and now advocates on behalf of homeless people, he passed out food, toiletry kits, supplies, and comfy Bombas socks to hundreds of people in need.

“I love creating kindness,” Zohaib said on Little Kids, Big Hearts. “I noticed that one person can make a difference … All you have to do is be kind.”

He said to make the world a better place, all you need to do is find one problem and then work to solve it. 

“All you have to find is a problem and a solution and no matter how old or young you are, you can always make a difference by just being kind,” he said. “Even if you just help one person that might change their life and make them think better about something and they help another person, they help another and another, and so on.”

Learn more about Zohaib and support his work here.

Learn About Zohaib

Katelynn Hardee, 7, Vista, California

When Katelynn was in kindergarten, she learned that there were kids at her school who couldn’t afford school lunch. She opened a hot cocoa and cookie stand to help out. 

She ended up using the money she earned to pay off all the school lunch debt at her school — and then for her entire elementary school district. 

This inspired a series of projects to help her community including starting a free library in her front yard and a school supplies drive. Katelynn finds ways to spread kindness in simple ways, too, like by drawing inspiring messages on her sidewalk!

“You do something and then it spreads,” she said. “Once I do something, and then the next person does something, then then the next person and then the next person.”

Learn more about Katelynn’s work here (her organization is called Kiki’s Kindness Project).

Learn About Kiki’s Kindness Project

Orion Jean, 11, Mansfield, Texas

Orion’s Race to Kindness project started with an online speech contest, which led him to create a kid-led movement — which has rapidly grown to have an enormous positive impact in his Texas community.

“I think that when I reached my first goal and surpassed it by over 100 toys, then I knew that there truly is hope because people — all people — have the ability to be kind,” he said. “Sometimes it just takes one person to bring it out of them.”

The pandemic interfered with a lot of people’s plans, but Orion says the pandemic was a catalyst for his many acts of kindness.

“Without the pandemic, maybe none of this would have even happened,” he said.

Learn more about Orion and get involved at his Race to Kindness website. 

Learn About Orion’s Race to Kindness

Listen to the Podcast for More

To hear more from Orion, Zohaib, and Katelynn, listen to Little Kids, Big Hearts episode How to Help wherever you find your podcasts!

As you listen, consider:

• Do their stories and ideas inspire you to help others?
• What are some ways you and your family can get involved and help in your local community? 

Little Kids, Big Hearts

Music: It’s magical! It can soothe anxious, cranky, or crying children, ease them into sleep, calm their worries, invite them into playfulness, and make difficult transitions smoother. 

Music and singing are parenting superpowers.

Singing and creating songs for each other is also a powerful way to express our love and care.

As the resident musician at Start Early’s Educare Chicago school, I work with mothers and fathers to help them write and sing personal lullabies for their babies, supporting maternal health, aiding childhood development, and strengthening the bond between parent and child.  In this article, we give ALL parents the tools they need to start working this type of musical magic in their own homes with their own children. You don’t need to be a singer/songwriter/musician — or even musical — to give your child the gift of music. 

How would you like to create a song for your child?

It might seem like a big, mysterious process to write a song, but it’s not. You probably already make up small songs all the time for your child without even realizing it. 

We can ALL write songs — we naturally have the tools! We usually don’t notice when we are humming to ourselves or making word patterns in our heads. That’s a songwriting tool! Another set of tools are the silly songs and rhymes we all make up featuring our children’s names. 

As you start to think of the words for a song for your child, remember: 

• Children love repetition — and it’s good for them developmentally. 
• Nothing fancy! You don’t need a fancy set of lyrics or an elaborate melody to create a song that will be meaningful to you and your child. 
• Even just singing their name — maybe with an added rhyming word, maybe just their name — is a special musical moment for your little one and you.

You can start brainstorming with these prompts:

• Do you want a slow sleepy song, or something upbeat?
• What is your child’s name? A name can inspire a whole song!
• Is there a special story behind your child’s name?
• Are there nicknames you use in your family? These can become part of your song.
• Does your child have a special stuffed animal or lovey, a favorite food, color, animal? Think about including your child’s “favorites” In your song.

As you keep thinking about your song, consider these questions:

• What are your dreams for your child?
• What is unique and beloved to you about your child?
• What do you and your child enjoy together?

The answers to any, or all, of these questions can help you create a special song to share with your child!

But what about a tune?

You can turn any hum or rhythm into your own song!

Or you can use one of our accompaniment tracks as an easy way to create a melody. 

Listen to a few notes of the music composed by Sam Wolsk and me (Anne-Marie Akin), then say your child’s name out loud in response to it — kind of like a question and answer. The music calls a little, then you respond, singing (or saying) your child’s name back. Try this with your child or on your own. Before you know it, you will have built a little song!

Track 1: Lullaby Ballad by Sam Wolsk & Anne-Marie Akin

Track 2: Lullaby Happy Bop by Sam Wolsk & Anne-Marie Akin

If you want to add more than just your child’s name name, you can create more lyrics. Try some of these song templates or create your own. Adding your child’s name makes it even more personal.

Get started with a lullaby template!

Here are some templates you can use to start writing your own song for your child. Feel free to adjust the number of name repetitions based on your own child’s name. 

“Happy Tune” Template

I like your ____________, 

Child’s name, Child’s name, Child’s name

I like your ______________, child’s name

And we both like to ______________. (something you like to do together! Dance? Run? Snuggle?)

“Dance Song” Template

Create a song using dance motions (Clap your hands! Fly like a bird) and your child’s name.

“Sleep Tune” Template

Child’s name, child’s name, close your eyes

Child’s name, child’s name, rest awhile

Tomorrow we will  __________________

But now it’s sleepy time.

“I Love You” Template

(This template uses comparisons. You can choose things that are important to you and your child! Think: as deep as, as wide as, as high as, as sweet as, as long as…)

I love you as ________ as _______

As __________ as ________________

Sleep my _____________

Sleep my _______________

I love you.

Share Your Song!

Once you have a draft of your first song, share it with your child! Be sure to watch his or her little face listening to your song. 

And, if you want, please share it on social media (tag us @bigheartworld). We’d love to hear your song, too!

“Thank You” to Sam Wolsk, who arranged the music!

Here’s Sam’s bio: Sam is a graduate of Northwestern University’s Bienen School of Music, where he earned a dual major in jazz studies and psychology. He is the founder of DW Jazz Orchestra, an ensemble that plays in Chicago and New York. Sam also plays piano and trumpet for Honey Butter, a local R&B/pop band. He has composed and arranged dozens of jazz and pop pieces, and he loves teaching his students how to play their favorite songs. He sees music as one of the most important avenues of self-expression and connection to others, and he loves equipping his students with the tools and techniques to participate in the conversation.

Learn More about the National Lullaby Project

Anne-Marie has been part of an effort called the National Lullaby Project, created by Carnegie Hall in New York. The project pairs professional artists with new parents to help them create their own lullabies for thier children. Learn more about the Lullaby Project. Listen to this piece by WBEZ Chicago to learn more more about Anne-Marie’s work in Chicago at WBEZ Chicago.